Posts Tagged ‘grief’
Dealing with Loss on Valentine’s Day
While love is in the air and cupid’s arrow is in full swing, Valentine’s Day can be such a painful holiday for so many who are dealing with the grief of losing their spouse. It just doesn’t seem fair that so many are celebrating their love, while others are mourning their loss on this day, as well as many other holidays past and yet to come.
It is incredibly important to have a “plan” for Valentine’s Day. Keeping in mind that everyone grieves differently and handles loss in their own way, the following are just a few ideas to help make this day a bit more tolerable:
1. Plan to avoid restaurants and social gathering places that might make you feel uncomfortable or lonely. If it’s possible to get together with some friends or family members, try to spend your time at their home or yours.
2. Refocus your attention. Valentine’s Day is about love, and there are so many ways to express that love. Why not have a candlelight dinner with your kids. Just imagine the laughter that will evoke. Or if you have a dog, find a recipe for some pet friendly goodies and spoil your pet. Be creative. This will take your mind off of your feelings of loss.
3. Perhaps you would like to reflect on your loved one. There’s nothing wrong with that. Start a journal and write down your thoughts. Write about some special memories that you have from past Valentine’s Days together. Hold on to those treasured memories as they can bring you great comfort. This could be a special time of reflection for you.
If you have struggled in the past on Valentine’s Day, please feel free to share how you were able to cope… this could really help someone today.
Warmest Regards,
Debbie
How Can We Help Those Grieving this Holiday Season?
Halloween has passed and Thanksgiving is just around the corner. We all know what that means! Christmas will, once again, sneak up on us. Unfortunately, so many of us wish we could just skip over this holiday season. Why?
It is incredibly sad that many are dreading this holiday season due to the passing of a loved one. As many of you, I have personally witnessed a number of families struggles through Christmas… holding back the tears while putting a smile on their face as to not affect everyone else’s Christmas holiday. Through these experiences, this appears to be the biggest obstacle:
People do not know how to react or what to say: Do we mention how we miss that person who has passed away? How will that make those grieving feel? Is it better just to ignore the topic in order to prevent sadness?
This is my personal opinion: They are already deeply saddened. There is nothing we can do or say that will make them feel any worse… well, maybe there is… avoiding the topic. They want to feel as though their loved one’s memory is still very much a part of the holiday season.
As I mentioned, this is my personal opinion due to my unfortunate experiences. I can very well be wrong. Please share your feeling or thoughts on this difficult topic. Perhaps we can make someone’s holiday season a bit less painful.